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you own something that has a picture of an emaciated wolf looking through a telescope on it
you are keeping this because you know it will be a rare possession someday
you pride yourself in your "clicker ticker" abilities
your favorite chapter of scripture is Abraham 3
you can say at least two words in Russian
you have a list of all the books that Dr. Taylor has referred to in class
you're reading the books that Dr. Taylor has referred to in class
you have a list of Feghoot punchlines
you are part of the "variable star consortium"
you've attempted to locate the amnesia field generator for the testing center
you refer to "lesser pluvial demigods" in casual conversation
you've ever told a Feghoot
you consider being subverted a good thing
you've ever discussed "comet spelunking"
you know several of the secrets of the Sadistic Professor's League
you've acted in behalf of the Sadistic (or Masochistic) Students' League
you refer to "apple shrinkage" to describe the surface of Mercury
you actually find Feghoots amusing
you've ever said, "What's a factor of 2 among friends?"
you've analyzed the physics of the amnesia field generator (it's all about the destructive interference of the brainwave patterns of every student who's ever taken a test in the T.C., resonating in time to increase in strength)
when you hear "the logic of this resembles the logic..." you begin packing your bags
you can speak at least one foreign language
you casually refer to the master, the doctor, and the high priestess of the dome
you use physics terms to describe your life
you can manage multivariable calculus and quantum mechanics, but you can't do simple arithmetic
some of your best friends are stars
you wonder how the vibrations from the music from the dance in the pendulum court would affect your observing
if you're a girl you have an unusual name, like "Liberty", "Celeste", "Delora", "Sherisa", etc.
if you're a boy you're named either Matt, Ben, or David
every time you walk out of a room you check to make sure you have your astronomy key with you
you know the meanings of the acronyms AAS, ApJ, AJ, PASP, and where to find them in the library
you've heard Mike Joner sing
you've seen Eric Hintz dance
you live on the fourth floor of the ESC
you know that the fourth floor of the ESC was decorated by Mike Joner
you know there's a fifth and even a sixth floor in the ESC
you know all of your professors on a first-name basis
you've seen the sun rise on your way home from campus multiple times
you're surprised to find out that you actually spent less than 12 hours in the ESC on a given day
you know the significance of the number "10978"
you cannot go anywhere near the ESC without being recognized by someone
you know the ABCs of astronomy
you can cha-cha
you see your classmates more often than your roommates
you've been TA'd by the high priestess of the dome
you TA 127
you understood that last one
you wonder why you don't pay rent to the ESC
if you've worked for Mike, you're married or engaged
you've tried to use your astronomy key to open your house or your car
you can type in the dark
you've stood on the deck for two hours straight during the winter
if you pass the ESC when the sky is clear, you look at the dome to make sure someone is observing
if you're on campus when the sky is clear, you purposely go past the ESC to make sure someone is observing
you pronounce "Oph" like you're being hit in the stomach
you avoid early morning classes at all costs
it's odd to you to realize that some people do their research during the day
you can't understand why everyone doesn't have all of the constellations memorized
you can survive in a class like Physics 711, but you're frustrated to no end in Geology 109
you hate Windows with a passion
you can't imagine what anyone would possibly do on a Friday night other than come to the planetarium show
you've grown weary of explaining the purpose of the red lights on the deck and the fifth floor
you've ever said, "This is what the sky would look like from Provo if Provo weren't there"
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